The observant among you will notice a new little panel at the bottom right showing Dilbert. Use it. Enjoy it. Pass it onto your friends.
Here are some universal truths I've come across in my 35 years on this 3rd rock from the sun...
- Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.
- At the end of every party there is always a girl crying.
- One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your
pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.
- Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly.
- You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a
fire in your back garden.
- Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl.
- You never know where to look when eating a banana.
- You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses.
- The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the
first given opportunity.
- Every bloke has at some stage while taking a pee, flushed half way
through and then raced against the flush.
- Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee.
- Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited.
- Old ladies can eat more than you think.
- You can't respect a man who carries a dog.
- Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their
arm broken by a swan.
- You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood
specifically to stir paint with.
- Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a
fruit salad.
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4 comments:
Good god this is funny stuff!!!!
I'll be back later to tell you which is my fav...
Glad I can amuse my dear. Spread the word!
When earing a banana, I close my eyes and savor every bite.
I think round sandwiches are very cool and taste way better than either triangles ore rectangles.
I can eat more food than you can imagine.
I think the funniest is the pint-to-toilet sychronization is my fav although i laughed out loud at old ladies eating a ton.
I would like to point out most of these are more specific to men because thinking of the pint-to-toilet sychronization, it hasn't in the past been a problem for me as a woman. We girls say hi and exchange pleasantries and then go into a stall. I understand it being slightly "off" for guys to do that. And the banana-eating doesn't cause me too much problem either. The smaller the monkey and the horse- yeah, maybe....
Hehe, thanks for the laugh and i'll share....Have a good day.
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