It's so hard...

I know I said I'd post every day, but I meant it when I said nothing exciting is going on right now.
If this was a film now I'd say something like "I just feel I'm meant for something more, something important..." and then a whole raft of adventures would befall me and I would end up in some foreign country somewhere sack deep in trouble.
Alas, life isn't like a film. I'm looking out the window and it's peeing down with rain and I'm waiting for Jake to come home. He's with me for the next couple of nights now which is cool but as the days are drawing in and it's getting darker earlier there's not as much time for him to go out with his mates and I know that frustrates him.

So what's been turning me on recently... Heroes Series 2, The Bluetones, Stephen Fry's "Chronicles", "An Idiot Abroad" with Karl Pilkington, Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, and beans & sausages on toast.

Soon it's the weekend, but hopefully something more interesting will happen between now and then and I can tell you all about it. Have a nice Wednesday.

The fridge rant

As promised.
Back on the 8th of September my fridge broke. There is a tiny copy pipe at the back of your fridge that contains the coolant stuff that keeps your beer and cheese cold. It is not very strong and can break when inadvertently struck with something heavy like a hoover *cough* not that I did this of course...
Anyway - I phone the number on the guarantee and was asked what the problem was. I was concerened primarily about the hissing gas that was escaping into my kitchen. I had visions of it causing me to collapse to the floor, struggling for breath all alone as though I was an extra in an episode of 'Casualty'. I was reassured that the gas was harmless and that an engineer would attend as soon as possible - the date given was 16th of September. 16th?! 8 bloody days without a fridge? I wasn't best pleased but sort of accepted that I am not a God and can't command instant attendance of my problems. Luckily, I had some spare cash so I popped off to Currys and bought one of those little bar fridges - just big enough to hold beer and.... I mean some milk, butter, the essentials.
So the 16th arrives as does the engineer (at 14:55 to be precise) which is typical isn't it after being told it could be anytime between 07:00 and 17:00 and waiting in all bloody day. But I digest. In comes the man with the tools, takes one look at the back of the fridge and says "yeah, I'm gonna need parts. I'll be back on the 27th". 27th?!? Are you fcukin' shittin' me?
that will be nearly 3 weeks without a fridge (I know, I know, I had the little bar fridge but that's not the point is it?). And off he toddles at 15:00. Waiting for 8 days and 7 hours for a 5 minute visit. Wank.
So here I sit, waiting in again for the man with the tools to turn up. Believe you me, if he arrives and says he can't fix it today, you'll hear my scream of impotent rage all the way in bloody Cornwall. I've been living off crap because I can't fit anything decent in the tiny little fridge - I want steaks and sausages and nice cheese and Japanese beer and chicken and fresh salads...
Once (if?) the fridge is fixed today tomorrow I will be doing a big shop and getting all manner of pleasurable things.
Have a nice Monday everybody.

A 'feelings' post...

Jake has been staying with me thoughout the week for the past three weeks, with just weekend visits to his mum. This is because she had some issues with accomodation but they are now sorted. So, for the past three weeks we've had a nice little routine going and it's been really nice. Today he has gone back to her until Wednesday. This weekend it's her birthday and on Monday it would have been our wedding anniversary. Consequently I'm in a bit of an emotional state today. I haven't mentioned this before, and I'm not going into details, but she has someone else in her life. So knowing he's going to be there as well... I'm not in a good place today.
I know deep down that I am not going to be replaced as Jake's dad but it's still hard to not feel threatened or insecure. Don't get me wrong, I don't go around feeling like this all day every day, but at times like this these kind of feelings surface.
Anyway - City are on TV today at lunchtime, so I can have a couple of beers in front of the match and then maybe walk over to the local pub for a little while. This melancholy mood won't last but I wanted to share it with you anyway. Have a nice Saturday.

A typical day

See, this is what I was talking about yesterday. Nothing interesting happened to me today. It was a normal, typical day that I've been living through the past few weeks.
Get up. Deal with Jake and get him off to school. Take a walk down to Stockport. Come back. Have lunch. Read / write / watch DVD's. Wait for Jake to come home.
It's now 15.30 and Jake should be back here in about 20 minutes. He'll then do any homework then either play out with his mates or stay in and watch TV. We'll then have something to eat, watch some TV together, then hit the sack. B-O-R-I-N-G!
Don't get me wrong, if I was working at the moment this sort of day would be bliss. But when you have precisely naff all else to do it kinda grates on the nerves somewhat.
I can tell you I've been buying lots of cool music (Skunk Anansie, Black Mountain, Example, Avenged Sevenfold to name but a few) and also reading some good stuff (at the moment I'm in the middle of Stephen Fry's "Chronicles" and a couple of Karl Pilkington books which do make me laugh).
I obviously want another job as soon as possible, and I will be looking back at this downtime wistfully when I do finally get back to work. But it's been so long now since I've done anything productive I can feel my brain turning to cold porridge between my ears.

So I'm sorry, no amusing anecdotes for today's post. But stay tuned as things will get better.

A momentous day

Mark it in your diaries. Thursday, September the 23rd is the day I re-launch this blog.
It's not a re-branding so everything will look the same, but from now on I will endevour to update it daily.
I have been inspired by people like Stephen Fry, Manuel The Waiter, and Karl Pilkington.
The problem is I am not really doing much on a day to day basis at the moment as I'm still out of work, but on those days where naff all happens I will try and entertain and inform you with whatever has been going through my head.
Let's just recap:
- Separated from my (ex) wife since January 2010. I will share some of my feelings on that.
- Jake is now a senior school student - I'll let you know how he's doing
- A new season has started with Wilmslow Town Vets FC - match reports will be forthcoming

I will be recording some more songs, attempting to write my own songs (I wanna try blues), and generally babbling away at you all.

I hope you all have not got bored and wandered away from this blog, and if you're still around thank you for your patience and I hope you will feel rewarded.

So... a new dawn etc. Let's go...

Headlines first...

Jake has started senior / high school and is doing really well. More to follow...
I'm first choice midfielder for Wilmslow Town Vets FC - updates on the way...

Stay tuned.

A good quote for my frame of mind

I have of late,—but wherefore I know not,—lost all my mirth, forgone all custom of exercises; and indeed, it goes so heavily with my disposition that this goodly frame, the earth, seems to me a sterile promontory; this most excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave o’erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire,—why, it appears no other thing to me than a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours. What a piece of work is man! How noble in reason! how infinite in faculties! in form and moving, how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension, how like a god! the beauty of the world! the paragon of animals! And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust?